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Thursday, August 24, 2006

Haters out in full force

Haters is clearly not just a book by Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez.

This is an exchange I just had with someone:

Obviously, like any blog reading, it's optional, so I highly suggest you unsubscribe from it. I would never want people to "have" to read anything I write. Contact Amazon or just click "block all posts," like you would with any other Amazon plog you did not want to read.

On 8/24/06, Judy wrote:
> Please no more messages on the amazon plog. Your picture seeen over and over
> is a real turn-off. Thank you


She was basically saying, "Please stop posting on your blog. I don't want to read it anymore." Um, yeah.

Or Diane Saltzberg's encounter with "Mr. Sensitive" on JDate. (via JDaters Anonymous)

For me, the hardest part is not internalizing it. I grew up so eager to please and wanting everyone to be happy that it's my first instinct to try to placate these people. "Oh, you don't like my Amazon posts, I'll stop." You'd pretty much have to die to please everyone, or never say or day a single thing, because every action is bound to offend someone. But for me to feel sane, my answer can't just be "fuck everyone else's opinion," because there are plenty of people whose opinions I do care about and I don't want to live a completely lonely existence. So balancing and learning and growing are what I'm all about lately. Spending most of my time outside of work on my own, in my head, with occasional bouts of sociability, but lately, I just can't do the piling on eventeventeventevent madness I used to. It makes me want to scream or cry or, most of all, escape. I love the solitude of having my own place and don't think I could give it up. I need it, but just as fervently I need the interaction I have with my friends and family, the hours-long phone calls, the goofy comedy shows, the little things that wind up meaning more to me than anything. And I guess dealing with haters is just part of life but I really try hard to stay above that level myself, to try to write about and interact with and surround myself with people who inspire me. It's easy to flock to people who can bring me down, who embody all of my own worst qualities and flaws and neuroses, because I can commiserate and understand that. I'm drawn to it, for sure, like a magnet, but I try to aspire to better things than being my own worst enemy, and that's all I can really do lately. Try. Aspire. Hope. Work. I can't do it all and I'm realizing that, I fail every single day, but I also, hopefully, also succeed.

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